Obituary: Lashiform, Rat Ogre for the Tail Slammers

Normally, we reserve high profile obituaries for players ranked in the top 25 players list. However, a death last night sent shockwaves through the league as all in attendance gathered round in shock and awe.

Last night in the Tail Slammers North Division game against the Drackwald Deadheads, Lashiform, the Tail Slammers resident Rat Ogre and (surprisingly) team Captain was shoved into the crowd where he was torn apart by rabid fans. The image of Lashiform swinging around, killing scores of fans while they slowly swarmed him will haunt us for some time (or until the next death comes along).

In his 16 game careers, Lashiform has been an interesting player to watch. While the rest of the Slammers have been killed off around him, Lasiform has gotten stronger and stronger. His unique skill choices such as Jump Up and break tackle have allowed him to harass the strongest of defences even when they thought they had just taken him down.

In terms of performance, Lashiform is one of the few players in the leagues history to cause 10 casualties (not including fans) and has killed another player once. From his humble beginnings in a Skaven Laboratory to his ultimate demise at the people who adored him, Lashiform has proven that not all Rat Ogres are bumbling, slow and useless (although he still managed to get himself sent off a few times for fouling…in front of the ref). Now for some facts (as always, figures are correct at the time of death)

  • One of the original Tail Slammers, debuting in the 2508/09 Season.
  • He was the 5th ranked active top casualty causer (and 5th of all time).
  • He was the 3rd top casualty causer of the season so far (2nd for the Open Scramble 2509/10 and 7th for the Pepslay Challenge 2509/10).

So far, the Slammers have confirmed that they will be hiring a new Rat Ogre shortly. No word on a name or who will become the new team Captain.

RIP Lashiform

6 comments

  1. Good riddance I say!
    He was the sole reason they managed to beat us in our first encounter with the Skaven earlier this season. I’d just like to take this opportunity to thank our fans for their sterling work in last night’s game!

  2. yes lashiform shall be missed in the team, but spirits are still high in the team, and the slightly blooded captain armband has been passed to number 11 Arcani spark who is registerd as joint 10th best player in the league as he is also one of the remaining original players of the team, and we have 2 promosing rat ogres to choose from they are Iron Rat and the Deli Ogre it a close compotision hopefully after are game with WTF we will have made a decision.
    Watch out reports remember what happend to the last person who asked about his death!!
    We LIE!! WE CHEAT!! WE STEAL!!

      1. *Spider Rat, Spider Rat, does whatever a Spider Rat Does* Ah the chant I will never forget. What say you Gerhard? Hows the paper pushing?

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