Season 6 – Week 6 – Back In My Broom Cupboard, For Now…

Wotcha guys an welcome back to my broom cupboard. Its been a while since i last been in here after all that fuss a few weeks ago, but the HDWSBBL council in their infinite wisdom ave given me a second chance at behaving myself. I’m under strict instructions to stay away from stadiums if not invited and if invited in not to get drunk and fondle anyone of a female persuasion.

Anyway enough of my ramblings lets get on with all the action. Now as you should all now be aware we have started the cross divisional part of the season. For those of you not paying attention and yes i mean you Whereinthehellarewe Tribe, this part of the competition sees North vs South and East vs West. Now for some reason i seem to be missing some results either due to games not happening or the ineptitude of my halfling assistant slash spy for the HDWSBBL council  Bandy Merrytook. This is what i got for you.

The first match i got for you is between Creeping Death and the Werethefuckdidtheylearnhowtoplay Tribe. On paper it should be of been an outright win to the Creeps, after narrowly losing out in their previous match they were due to dish out some pain, Norse style. Wot the hell happened. Instead of dishing some Norse style pain they took a beating Halfling style. With flings winging through the air all the Creeps could do was watch. The match ended 3-2 to the flings. Although the Creeps did manage to score it was far from the scoreline i expected. It just goes to show…

The rest of the matches that took place were the low scoring affairs that we have become accustomed to this season with the exception of the match between the Blackburners and the Defilers. Without breaking out in to much of a sweat the Defilers beat the Blackburners 2-0. The other results were Grimwood Voodoo’s 2 the Gelfs 1. Voodooy. Temper Bay Marauders 1 the Valhallen Vixens 0. Who would of guessed. Bloody useless…

Well that just about wraps things up…

Hold on, just been handed some late results. Bandy your a useless stunty twat. Universal Horrors 1, Tutsbones Jackles 0.

Deamon Stump Deamonicans 1, Elfheim Razorhawkes 0.

Talos Tobacconists 1, Lighting Claws 1.

Well that really is everything. I’ll let you know how the match between Brimstone Flayers and Wee Tree Fellows goes when it happens. Next report will be coming from the home of the Valhallen Vixens who are entertaining the Universal Horrors and i for one want a front row seat so can i heckle them as they lose, again…

Till then i’m the Janitor.

Quick Summary of Week 6

  • 7 games in Cross Division – World Series 2511/12
  • 15 Touchdowns scored
  • 19 Casualties caused (6 resulted in Death)
  • 11 Completions made
  • 1 Interception made
  • 28,000 fans was the highest recorded attendance.

Match Results for Week 6

(numbers in brackets are the casualties caused by each team)

World Series 2511/12 – Cross Division

Obituaries for Week 6

Player Statistics for the (Week 6)

Best Players

# Player Position Team Value
1 Blanca Catcher The Gelfs 26
2 Azul Wardancer The Gelfs 20
3 Gorsquakor Beastman Drakwald Defilers 19
4 Festus “The Pestitant” Chaos Warrior Drakwald Defilers 18
5 Little Running Behind Halfling Whereinthehellarewe Tribe 17
Two Whistles Halfling Whereinthehellarewe Tribe 17
7 Turgon Daeron Catcher Elfheim Razorhawks 15
Haggis Linesman We Tree Fellows 15
9 Rog Turin Blitzer Elfheim Razorhawks 14
Dushruk Hobgoblin Deamons Stump Deamonicans 14

Top Scorers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Blanca Catcher The Gelfs 7
2 Gorsquakor Beastman Drakwald Defilers 4
(7) Dec Catcher We Tree Fellows 4
Dushruk Hobgoblin Deamons Stump Deamonicans 4
Two Whistles Halfling Whereinthehellarewe Tribe 4
6 Rog Turin Blitzer Elfheim Razorhawks 3
Little Running Behind Halfling Whereinthehellarewe Tribe 3
Gurt Tombbrood Ghoul Grimwood Voodoo 3
Azul Wardancer The Gelfs 3
Hamilton Catcher We Tree Fellows 3

Most Vicious

# Player Position Team Value
1 Festus “The Pestitant” Chaos Warrior Drakwald Defilers 4
Lucky Strike Minotaur Talos Tobacconists 4
3 Azul Wardancer The Gelfs 3
4 Mehutu Se Skeleton (Legacy) The Tutsbone Jackles 2
Frank Shellnstein Flesh Golem Universal Horrors 2
Badruck Smash’burn Black Orc Blocker Temper Bay Marauders 2
Atem Ra Mummie Grimwood Voodoo 2
Sutekh Iah Mummie Grimwood Voodoo 2
Sesslith “The Seductive” Chaos Warrior Drakwald Defilers 2
Kalbaz Skaven Blitzer Lightning Claws 2

Top Passers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Roxanna Thrower The Gelfs 7
2 Macbeth Thrower We Tree Fellows 6
3 Manwe Durion Thrower Elfheim Razorhawks 4
Erika Thrower Valhallen Vixen’s 4
Morgrat Shadowthrow Thrower Temper Bay Marauders 4
6 (03) Hamish ‘The Hammer’ Thrower We Tree Fellows 3
Catheral Thrower The Gelfs 3
8 Turgon Daeron Catcher Elfheim Razorhawks 2
Haggis Linesman We Tree Fellows 2
Aedeorl Coldheart Blitzer Brimstone Flayers 2

Top Interceptors

# Player Position Team Value
1 Zhatan Deamontongue Chaos Dwarf Blocker Deamons Stump Deamonicans 1

6 comments

  1. “Without breaking out in to much of a sweat the Defilers beat the Blackburners 2-0.”

    Oi! The only reason you couldn’t see them sweat was because it was obscured by all of the blood! Do you know how many times the Burners got through the armour of the Defilers? Those bastards don’t armour lightly either.

    Of course you could say the same for the Defilers, but most of those injuries were on Hobgoblins. Those don’t count surely?

    Fact remains the Defilers are very well coached team, and the Blackburners have well and truly inherited the Shadows luck. If those Hobs hadn’t started fumbling every other roll they made in the second half, it could have easily been a more respectable 2-1 instead.

    Also, hats off to Tantor, who routinely earns his pay every game. The sight of him tearing a beastman in twain during the second half was real highlight of the game.

  2. Dear Jojo.
    Stop your bloody moaning. There may of been plenty of bloodshed in your match but casulitys dont win matches.
    The only reason the Blackburners have inherited the Shadows bad luck is because they were stupid enough to let you near the team…

    Janitor.

    1. Look. The Daemonicans loss was down to bad coaching, this one was down to bad luck. There is a difference.

      Oh well, Elves this week, goody.

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