So, here we are then. Week two. What? Where was I for week one? Nagash is back. That’s where I effing was for week one. Anyway, week 2.
Temper Bay vs Blackmountain Bloodjaws
In the first half, the Mads gave new Orc boys on the block the Bloodjaws a show on how it’s done, with a sound drubbing in the first half. Perhaps the Bloodjaws, after giving the poor old Burners a thorough pounding last match had developed a degree of overconfidence that was to prove to be their downfall?
Nope. Come the second half, after what must have been an absolutely apocalyptic amount of shouting by their coach the Jaws pulled themselves together and scraped up a draw.
Fairy Wizards Guild vs Monster Mashers
The Fairy Wizards Guild continue this recent trend for giving teams innocuous names that give no information about them. The Fairies are a Chaos Pact team, well best of luck to them, they surely couldn’t do any worse than Damage Inc.
I mean, statistically speaking I’m pretty sure it’s not possible.
Anyway, the Fairies have a nasty streak for jamminess that puts me in mind of the now thankfully dead Arcani Spark, but the Mashers are a solid Necro team, the kind I wish I used to coach.
It always warms my inanimate heart to see a Necromantic team give another team a good thumping. Utter carnage and mayhem was on the cards for this match, just what you want to see in a good game of blood bowl.
Oxmoor Savages Vs Carcassone Province Paladins
Fun fact, the Paladins are actually humans, not Elves. Who knew? Also, the Savages are a traditional Chaos Team in the hands of a coach who knows his way around the blocking, blitzing and putting-the-boot-in-when-the-ref-is-looking-elsewhere side of the game. The Pallies touchdown proved they aren’t a team to discount this year, but in the end the Savages pulled ahead in the second half for a 2-1 win.
Mycean Marauders vs the Vixens
Now, nobody was as surprised as I was to see the Vixens making a return. The Myckies are this years new Wood Elf team, one of the few agility teams to take part in this year, no doubt the cheating dagger ears will be looking to emulate such superstar teams as the Loren Rangers and the infamous Korsairs.
Against Elvish agility the Vixens seem to be holding their own despite letting in a Touch… wait a second, that can’t be right, this scorecard is saying that’s the Vixens TD.
Bloody hell they’re winning! Could this be the turning point for the Vixens and Brynhilder? COULD THIS MARK AN AMAZING TURNAROUND WHERE AT LONG LAST THE VIXENS WILL STORM THE LEAGUES TO LIFT SILVERWA… oh no nevermind they just fumbled it.
False alarm, Normal performance standards have been resumed.
Darkfleet Assassins vs Nordringen Titans
The Titans hardly have the best track record, and I think we’ve only had one Dark Elf team in the league history NOT get their greedy effeminate elfhands on some silverware, so the writing was probably on the wall for this one.
Nevertheless, the Titans are the team with more experience behind them, all of it bad, I’ll grant you, but I know better than anyone that sometimes you take what you can get.
Experience will out they say and 2-1 to the humans proved to be the Elf undoing as the clout was laid on the pansyhands goth wanna-bes.
Blackburners Vs The Brewers
Two experienced teams faced off for what turned out to be a solid 2-0 win for the Brewers. Another lot of bad form for the Blackburners who continue to struggle to get that first point. Ultimately the Brewers had the better form, and what few mistakes they did make, the Burners were never able to properly capitalise on.
The fans must have been infuriated as well, as when one of the Bull Centaurs wandered too close to the edge of the field, a quick nudge from a Brewers player saw him in the crowd. Furious fans armed with chainsaws descended on the poor demi-bullock and within minutes he was being served as rump steak. A bad game for them all round.
The Brewers meanwhile get a good win under their belt with no casualties as they go into what will surely be a hard match against Big Society.
Arkhan Black Towers vs Mordheim Comets
Finally a Skaven team without Arcani Spark and they have began to redeem themselves after a bad performance. The first half showed what rats do – a quick hand off-pass-run like sh*te playfollowed by a 7 turn undead death-march to end the 1st half 1-1. It all looked good for The Doc in the 2nd half until a failed cage from the undead left the ball dropping into the hands of a mummy who not knowing what to do with it failed to block a simple line-rat. Well after some more skaven spawny plays it ended 2-1 to the rats in the dying seconds. The next matches will be vital for all in that group.
See you all next week for the cup matches
Quick Summary of Week 2
- 2 games in NWC North – World Series 2514/15
- 2 games in NWC South – World Series 2514/15
- 2 games in OWC East – World Series 2514/15
- 2 games in OWC West – World Series 2514/15
- 23 Touchdowns scored
- 26 Casualties caused (3 resulted in Death)
- 18 Completions made
- 23,000 fans was the highest recorded attendance.
Match Results for Week 2
(numbers in brackets are the casualties caused by each team)
World Series 2514/15 – NWC North
- Carcassonne Province Paladins 1 (0) – 2 (1) Oxmoor Savages (att 20,000)
- OXS: Coneygear, Norfolk
- CPP: François de la Maine
- Fairy Wizards Guild 0 (1) – 3 (3) Ashut Titans (att 20,000)
- AST: Bris Goat-boy (x3)
World Series 2514/15 – NWC South
- Mordheim Comets 0 (0) – 2 (3) Monster Mashers (att 10,000)
- MM: Spot, Doggy
- Mordheim Comets 2 (1) – 1 (3) Arkhan Black Towers (att 18,000)
- ABT: Gutwrencher
- MHC: Orz Blackpelt, Vig Azoek
World Series 2514/15 – OWC East
- Nordenringen Titans 1 (3) – 3 (1) Darkfleet Assasins (att 23,000)
- NTN: Steve the Bandit
- DFA: Fracan Heartstabber, Ludual Sharpfoot, Enda Blacksun
- Mycenaen Marauders 1 (1) – 3 (3) Valhallen Vixen\’s (att 19,000)
- VAL: Viktor (x3)
- MYM: Nimmon
World Series 2514/15 – OWC West
- Blackburners 0 (1) – 2 (0) The Brewers (att 23,000)
- BREW: Chuck von Norris, Brunbare
- Temper Bay Marauders 1 (4) – 1 (1) Black Mountain Bloodjaws (att 18,000)
- TBM: Garash Rockhead
- BMB: Korgak the Krazy
Obituaries for Week 2
- Chad Meathammer (Bull Centaur for Blackburners):
- Blunderball Bironas (Thrower for Nordenringen Titans): Killed by a Dark Elf. He was ranked 4# Best Human Thrower of all-time and ranked #13 Best thrower in the league of all-time (Rankings are up to the date of his death).
- Romeo Conbolt (Marauder for Fairy Wizards Guild): A short lived career for this Marauder. Killed by a Hobgoblin.
World Series 2514/15 Standings for the (Week 2)
** New World Confrence (NWC) **
|Carcassonne Province Paladins||2||1||0||1||3||3||0||2||2||0||3|
|Fairy Wizards Guild||2||0||0||2||1||5||-4||1||4||-3||0|
|Arkhan Black Towers||2||1||0||1||4||2||2||7||4||3||3|
|Slaaneshi Big Society||2||1||0||1||2||3||-1||7||5||2||3|
** Old World Confrence (OWC) **
|Black Mountain Bloodjaws||2||1||1||0||3||1||2||4||4||0||4|
|Temper Bay Marauders||2||0||2||0||2||2||0||5||2||3||2|
Player Statistics for the (Week 2)
|–||François de la Maine||Catcher||Carcassonne Province Paladins||11|
|7||LaQuinton \’Cuddles\’ Evans||Ogre||Nordenringen Titans||9|
|–||RK Jowling||Chaos Warrior||Slaaneshi Big Society||9|
|–||Prince Ehtar||Mummie||Arkhan Black Towers||9|
|–||Gutwrencher||Ghoul||Arkhan Black Towers||9|
|2||Gutwrencher||Ghoul||Arkhan Black Towers||3|
|–||Bris Goat-boy||Hobgoblin||Ashut Titans||3|
|4||Garash Rockhead||Blitzer||Temper Bay Marauders||2|
|–||Steve the Bandit||Linesman||Nordenringen Titans||2|
|–||François de la Maine||Catcher||Carcassonne Province Paladins||2|
|–||Chuck von Norris||Blitzer||The Brewers||1|
|–||Grolsch von Lager||Catcher||The Brewers||1|
|1||Nagosh Tear\’hearts||Blitzer||Temper Bay Marauders||2|
|–||LaQuinton \’Cuddles\’ Evans||Ogre||Nordenringen Titans||2|
|–||RK Jowling||Chaos Warrior||Slaaneshi Big Society||2|
|–||Prince Ehtar||Mummie||Arkhan Black Towers||2|
|–||Silvious Soulreaper||Wight||Arkhan Black Towers||2|
|–||Zhuthark Blood-Nose||Chaos Dwarf Blocker||Ashut Titans||2|
|–||Kaine Soulshredder||Blitzer||Darkfleet Assasins||2|
|–||Korgak the Krazy||Blitzer||Black Mountain Bloodjaws||2|
|–||Kirkus||Snow Troll||Valhallen Vixen\’s||1|
|2||Émile De\’Manning||Thrower||Carcassonne Province Paladins||5|
|–||Blunderball Bironas||Thrower||Nordenringen Titans||2|
|–||Ezra Scariet||Dark Elf Renegade||Fairy Wizards Guild||2|
|–||Vrograg Spleen Chucker||Thrower||Black Mountain Bloodjaws||2|
|–||Jager von Meister||Thrower||The Brewers||1|
|–||Jorgan Heineken||Catcher||The Brewers||1|