Posted on July 10, 2019
- Duration: 4th Jul 2519 – 10th Jul 2519
- Competition(s): Chanelf Challenge Cup 2519
- Season: 2519/20 Season
Another report fresh off the press from JoJo for the third round matches!
Something seems to be going very wrong for the elves in this competition, they just can’t seem to catch a break. This is of course hilarious. It just goes to show, sometimes the best team on paper isn’t the best team on the day. Basically, if it could go wrong today, it did go wrong. Did the Norse slip something untoward into their pre-match and half-time beverages? And if so, where can I get some? Or alternatively, did the Stags get all of their gear by stealing it from a gypsy witch living at a crossroads who vowed revenge upon them? SOMETHING like this is going on here, and I promise you all I will not rest until I have gotten to the bottom of this… and found out if I can replicate it.
The Blitzers Beast of Nurgle proved too horrifying for even these half-sized heroes to have a go at, and with it’s writhing tentacles and foul appearance it managed to pin them down long enough for the Pestigor to score. With their advantage secured the Bile Blitzers then shut things down for the rest of the game, which against a more aerodynamic team than most can be a difficult thing to do, so credit where it’s due to the Blitzers for managing it.
Both teams seem to be playing better in the third round, the Juniaz managing not to suffer a cavalcade of targeted fouls in the first few seconds of the game, and the frogs getting in an early lead. However, even with them on the pitch the “special” players of the Juniaz side couldn’t seem to make the impact they needed, and in the second half the Rainmakers secured their lead with a second TD and a swift boot to the head of the Doomdiver. The first win for a Frog team this year.
Sometimes you have to admire the perserverance of fans when they smuggle in the parts for a trebuchet and build it right there on the stands like the Spacehoppers did this week. With Zara splattered in the opening seconds of the game things were looking up for these frogs. But then the Halflings got angry, and you wouldn’t like them when they’re angry. Violence led to touchdowns, and their froggy opponents fled from these pint-sized berserkers, luckily however they fled in the right direction and whilst holding the ball. Both frogs teams finally managing to pick up their first wins in this round, and with the right results they could still end up 2nd or 3rd.
A game marred by complaints from the Dwarf team that their punching gloves had been tampered with and replaced with foam pads. In truth, most of these complaints seem to stem from the fact that they had already done this to their opponents this round and they seemed most aggrieved over the lack of orginality and creativity. Then both sides took those plates off in the second half and things got a bit unpleasant. For the Amazons. Although it has to be said that the Thunderers ballsy attacks on the Deathroller actually working did endear many a casual fan to their cause. Easily the closest game these Dwarves have had all competition, and even they were forced to grudgingly admit that if the Thunderers receiver hadn’t managed to somehow punch himself in the face when attempting to brush off his man-marker for a catch then this game could have EASILY ended in a draw.
Quick Summary of Week 3
- 5 games in Central Division – Chanelf Challenge Cup 2519
- 9 Touchdowns scored
- 13 Casualties caused (3 resulted in Death)
- 5 Completions made
- 1 Interception made
- 23,000 fans was the highest recorded attendance.
Match Results for Week 3
(numbers in brackets are the casualties caused by each team)
Chanelf Challenge Cup 2519 – Central Division
- The Tlaqua Spacehoppers 2 (1) – 1 (5) Hobbiton Gardeners (att 23,000)
- TSH: Leaper Organa (x2)
- HBG: Karla Von Kill
- Themysciran Thunderers 0 (0) – 1 (1) Barack Varr Dreadnauts (att 22,000)
- BVD: Grung Fodrinsson
- Gaen Vale Stags 0 (1) – 2 (3) Norsca Wild Fire (att 14,000)
- NWF: Aleksander Lødemel (x2)
- The Bloated Bile Blitzers 1 (1) – 0 (1) Bridgetown Bantams (att 20,000)
- BBB: Pustule Picker
- Akumal City Rainmakers 2 (0) – 0 (0) Pastafarian Juniaz (att 11,000)
- ACR: Huani (x2)
Obituaries for Week 3
- Durlan Sylbalar (Blitzer for Gaen Vale Stags): Killed!!!
- Nieven (Journeyman for Gaen Vale Stags): Killed!!!
- L. Croakribbittson (Linefrog for The Tlaqua Spacehoppers): Killed!!!
Standings (After Third Round)
|Barack Varr Dreadnauts||3||3||0||0||4||1||3||5||1||4||90|
|Norsca Wild Fire||3||2||0||1||5||1||4||6||5||1||60|
|The Bloated Bile Blitzers||3||2||0||1||2||1||1||4||5||-1||60|
|Akumal City Rainmakers||3||1||2||0||5||3||2||4||2||2||50|
|The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||3||1||1||1||5||5||0||2||7||-5||40|
|Gaen Vale Stags||3||1||0||2||6||6||0||5||8||-3||30|
Player Statistics for the (Week 3)
|1||Leaper Organa||Catcher||The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||14|
|–||Huani||Catcher||Akumal City Rainmakers||14|
|–||Aleksander Lødemel||Norse Linesman||Norsca Wild Fire||14|
|4||Grung Fodrinsson||Runner||Barack Varr Dreadnauts||12|
|–||Zilyana Torjeon||Catcher||Gaen Vale Stags||12|
|6||Chacaerulea||Linefrog||Akumal City Rainmakers||10|
|–||Jar Jar Skinks||Catcher||The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||10|
|–||Matthewn \\\”Chopper\\\” Harris||Troll Slayer||Barack Varr Dreadnauts||10|
|–||Bialaer Pavyre||Linesman||Gaen Vale Stags||10|
|1||Grung Fodrinsson||Runner||Barack Varr Dreadnauts||4|
|2||Leaper Organa||Catcher||The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||3|
|–||Aleksander Lødemel||Norse Linesman||Norsca Wild Fire||3|
|4||Pustule Picker||Pestigor||The Bloated Bile Blitzers||2|
|–||Mhaenal Elamice||Blitzer||Gaen Vale Stags||2|
|–||Zilyana Torjeon||Catcher||Gaen Vale Stags||2|
|–||Ozwold||Doom Diver||Pastafarian Juniaz||2|
|–||Huani||Catcher||Akumal City Rainmakers||2|
|–||Kukulcun||Blitzer||Akumal City Rainmakers||2|
|2||Trunkgirth Hardwood||Treeman||Hobbiton Gardeners||3|
|3||Angus \\\”Lucky\\\” Loriccson||Deathroller||Barack Varr Dreadnauts||2|
|–||Charlie \”Chicken\” Choker||Halfling Hopeful||Hobbiton Gardeners||2|
|–||Huani||Catcher||Akumal City Rainmakers||2|
|–||Bill Bunce||Halfling Hopeful||Bridgetown Bantams||2|
|8||Chacaerulea||Linefrog||Akumal City Rainmakers||1|
|–||L. Croakribbittson||Linefrog||The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||1|
|–||Luke Flystalker||Catcher||The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||1|
|1||Leaper Organa||Catcher||The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||5|
|–||Jar Jar Skinks||Catcher||The Tlaqua Spacehoppers||5|
|–||Andrathatm Eilfina||Thrower||Gaen Vale Stags||5|
|4||Huani||Catcher||Akumal City Rainmakers||4|
|5||Mictlantecuhtli||Linefrog||Akumal City Rainmakers||1|
|–||Xheel Xchek||Linefrog||Akumal City Rainmakers||1|
|–||Zilyana Torjeon||Catcher||Gaen Vale Stags||1|
|–||Oaxacun||Blitzer||Akumal City Rainmakers||1|
|1||Kristoffer Henriksen||Norse Linesman||Norsca Wild Fire||1|
This entry was posted in Challenge Cup, JoJo Reports, League News, Results, Season 14, Summary, Warzone and tagged Round 3. It mentions The Tlaqua Spacehoppers, Hobbiton Gardeners, Themysciran Thunderers, Barack Varr Dreadnauts, Gaen Vale Stags, Norsca Wild Fire, The Bloated Bile Blitzers, Bridgetown Bantams, Akumal City Rainmakers, Pastafarian Juniaz in the Chanelf Challenge Cup 2519. <Permalink>. No Comments »