Tag: shadows

Open Scramble 2510/11 Final Preview

Believe it or not we are finally entering the end phase of the season. It has been very quiet around here lately with the world moving quickly around us but its time to divert attention back to the league for the final push of the 2510/11 Season.

Tonight will see the long awaited final of the Open Scramble 2510/11 between the North Division winners the Innsmouth Shadows and the South Division champions the Loren Rangers.

Knowing that this is their last season in the HDWSBBL, the Shadows have given it their all. After finishing near the bottom of their division for the past few seasons something finally clicked with the team (or snapped in JoJo’s head) and they began to rack up the wins. During the league stages it looked as though they where going to have another run of the mill season but a few high profile wins (and some well timed losses by the other contenders) ensured that the Shadows picked up their first ever divisional championship and booked their place in the league final for the first time. If they won tonight it would be fitting that they would win their first HDWSBBL Championship against those Elves.

The Rangers will be keen to see a win in this match. After holding out hopes for winning all three major HDWSBBL championships in a season they suffered their first loss of the season in the Championship V first round during their last outing. The Rangers are very used to this type of pressure having won the inaugural Open Scramble back in 2506/07 and having won the HDWSBBL Challenge cup and now three Divisional championships. The Rangers certanyl have the star power and the skill to win the cup but can they put their nerves and pride to the side for one  night and win the HDWSBBL League cup for the second time?

The Rangers are the odds on favourite to win the match but nobody should rule out the Shadows, especially when they are the underdog. Tune in tonight to see the exciting climax to the Open Scramble 2510/11 and see if the Rangers can become two time champions or if the Shadows can come up with some new diabolical trick which will allow them to claim their first HDWSBBL Championship.

30 games for the Innsmouth Shadows

We are a little bit late on this one but here at the HDWSBBL we are proud to announce that another team has reached the milestone of 30 games. Recently the Innsmouth Shadows played their 30th game against the Lustrian Leapers in the opening round of the Spite Challenge 2510/11 which resulted in a draw. As is now the tradition, we will take a look back at their career to date in the HDWSBBL.

The Innsmouth Shadows first joined the HDWSBBL as an expansion team at the start of the 3rd season (2508). They where immediately placed within North Division where they have been ever since.

The Shadows didn’t have the best start to their careers and it took them until their 5th game in the HDWSBBL to pick up their first win in a match against the Seductors! From there the shadows endured a savage 5 game losing streak until they defeated the Wee Tree Fellows in the opening round of the Ankle Biter Competition. Before this victory the Shadows where in danger of being lost amongst all the new teams and being forgotten like some of the other failed teams, however in the second round of the Ankle Biter the Shadows took part in one of the most controversial moments in HDWSBBL History ensuring that they would not be forgotten in a hurry.

During a Semi-Final game against the Middenhein Manhunters the Shadows had played a good match and looked like they would be advancing to the finals. However just before they scored the winning Touchdown the ball was knocked out of play and landed in the crowd. The ball was then thrown down the field with great accuracy to the Shadows End Zone where the Manhunters simply picked up the ball and scored the winning touchdown! To this day the Shadows claim it was one of the Loren Rangers who threw the ball which cost them the match. In their defence, the Rangers did occupy the entire front row for the match and are notorious for their accurate passing. The controversy, and JoJo’s hatred for Elves continues to this day.

Since that day the Shadows have maintained a curious win / loss record in the league. They are notorious for not having much luck during the league stages of any competition for the HDWSBBL League cup but they often find that they advance through at least one round of every other competition they enter! Take the 2509/10 season for example. After losing 6 of their 8 games in the Open Scramble 2510/110 the Shadows went on to come 2nd in the Pepslay Challenge competition almost managing to topple the Loren Rangers (it did take a whole arsenal of secret weapons, bribes, traps, blackmail and downright deviousness to get there but that is just par for the course!).

So far, this season they are on the top of their game. At the moment of writing they are at the top of North Division (which is a nice change from coming in last in North for the past two seasons) and have a good chance of staying that way. Could the Shadows finally end that long and rocky road to their first HDWSBBL Championship this season? We might have our answer in only a few short weeks.

The Opponents

The Shadows have had a number of feuds over the years. They may not be feuds in the same way as say RSV and the Rangers, but whenever the Shadows get drawn against certain other teams there is always palatable tension in the air. The three teams that the Shadows have encountered the most times over the past 30 games are the Karond Kar Corsairs, The Tail Slammers and the Wee Tree Fellows. On the whole they have had the best luck against WTF as they have won two games, drawn a game and lost a game.

Of course, no entry on the Shadows can be published without commenting on the Shadows distaste of Elves. Now for some reason JoJo has it in his head that there is some vast conspiracy against him and his kind that is being organised by the Elves of the Old World. JoJo Points to several occasions where his team has had the upper hand only to be thwarted by Elves. Normally at this point we recap the different races and teams that a team has faced over their 30 games, for the Shadows we will show exactly who they have played, heir racial breakdown, and a very special table just for JoJo:

Team Pld W L D
Beaumont Blitzers 2 1 1
Drackwald Deadheads 2 2
Grappler Flesh Grinders 1 1
Karond Kar Corsairs 4 4
Lustria Leapers 1 1
Mc Cauligh Reavers 1 1
Middenhein Manhunters 1 1
Seductors 1 1
Tail Slammers 4 2 2
Teotigua Predators 1 1
The Bile Blitzers 2 2
The Brewers 1 1
The Loren Rangers 3 2 1
The Wolf Pack 2 2
We Tree Fellows 4 2 1 1
Race Pld W L D
Dark Elf 6 1 5
Elf 4 2 1 1
Human 2 1 1
Lizardmen 1 1
Necromantic 2 2
Norse 2 2
Nurgle 2 2
Orc 3 1 1 1
Skaven 4 2 2
Slann 1 1
Wood Elf 3 2 1
Race Pld W L D
Elves 13 3 8 2
Non-Elves 17 6 9 2

The Players

In their 30 games, there have been 21 Players / Creatures who have worn the team colours. They have been in the following positions:

  • 11 Zombies (of which 2 where Journeymen, another 1 was taken from the Wee Tree Fellows)
  • 3 Ghouls
  • 3 Wights
  • 2 Werewolves
  • 2 Flesh Golems

For a team primarily consisting of players assembled from stolen body parts, the players have an surprisingly long average career length of 20.11 games. However only 2 players have taken part in all 30 games, Eleeazar Smith (Werewolf) and Nig (Zombie).

In total the team has scored 44 Touchdowns (averaging 2.32 per player), caused 58 causalities (at an average of 3.1 per player), made 24 completions (with an average of 1.26 per player) but caught only 3 Interceptions (though impressively, one of which was by Carter the Zombie!). In total, the team is the most violent team currently active in the HDWSBBL and is ranked the 4th most violent team in HDWSBBL history. They are the 2nd most deadly active team to face and are tied at 9th place in the most deadly teams in HDWSBBL history listing.

As for the Players themselves, the top 5 players of all time on the team are as follows:

Eleeazar Smith (Werewolf) – 83 SPP
Most Violent player on the team, played in all 30 games. Eleeazar is also the most violent player in HDWSBBL history (both active and all time) and ranked 6 on the top 25 active players list (11th of all time).
Erza Wheedon (Werewolf) – 78 SPP
One of the top scorers of the team, send most violent player in the team. Ranked 7th on the top 25 active players list (13th of all time)
Simon Orne (Ghoul) – 60 SPP
Top Scorer of the team, best passer of the team. Simon is ranked 10th on the top 25 active players list (20th of all time) and is currently the 4th top active scorer (9th of all time).
Carter (Zombie) – 38 SPP
Most MVP awards received on the team, Best Zombie Player of all time and the 18th best active player in the HDWSBBL
Captain Whipple (Wight) – 28 SPP
Was one of the most promising players on the team until he suffered his second death during a match with the Tail Slammers at the start of 2510. He was also the Team Captain.

Final Words

Before we show their statistics for their 30 games in the HDWSBBL, we thought it best to have a word with their head coach himself. Over to you JoJo:

It seems like only yesterday that the shadows first played……. Actually no, that’s a colossal lie. Its been a long and unpleasant road to get this far, beset upon at all sides by betrayal, cheating, incompetence and Elves.

But here we are, 30 games later. We are bigger, meaner, quicker and fatter then ever before – but only time will tell if we can actually put this to use.

This is why regardless of what happens, I am announcing that the shadows will officially be disbanding at the end of this season!

I feel that as a team there’s nowhere else for us to go, and if we cannot hoist a trophy at the end of this season then we never will.

Also, I feel that CERTAIN TEAMS refuse to move on and let new talent come in which stifles the league as a whole. I for one would rather end it now then have people say GO NOW YOU GITS, NOBODY WANTS YOU TO STAY AND NOBODY ENJOYS SEEING YOU WIN TROPHY ATER TROPHY YOU POINTY EARED GITS!

Well, thats how I feel anyway.

Thanks JoJo, I think we best leave it there. Below is the performance of the Innsmouth Shadows after 30 HDWSBBL games saved for prosperity.

The Innsmouth Shadows 30 9 17 4 46 62 60 48 24 3 30

Season 5 – Week 1 – Let the action begin

Welcome everyone to the 2510/11 Season of the HDWSBBL! Now in our fifth season the League hopes to continue to deliver the action you require. In the opening week of the new season we saw 12 of the 14 teams in action, the first death of the season and a league milestone being reached.

The honour of the Opening match of the season went to the North Division clash between the Predators and the Tail Slammers. These two teams are both favourites to win North Division so the outcome may be crucial later on in the competition. The stadium was packed as the 31,000 fans in attendance looked forward to a good match.

Their expectations where certainly met. The second the whistle blew, the Lizardmen pounced. With the opening punch, Moxal the Kroxigor managed to cave in the skull of the Slammers Rat Ogre Lashiform Jr!! The Skaven where not put of though and quickly regrouped. Trying to describe the flow of this match is like trying to describe the pattern of a Tornado, the match saw so much action including 2 riots as the fans got too excited. In the end the Slammers won the match 5-4 with the Predators unlucky to concede the final touchdown. The total of 9 Touchdowns scored in the match equals the record for most Touchdowns scored in a single match set last season during an encounter between the Tail Slammers and the Wee Tree Fellows.

South Divisions first game was between the HDWSBBL Challenge Cup Champions the Loren Rangers and the new Dark Elves, the Brimstone Flayers. Most of the 32,000 fans in attendance expected to see the Rangers dominate like last season but the Flayers had come prepared. Having filled their team full of Mercs the Flayers gave everything they got and at one point took the lead. The Rangers could not be held down forever though and they eventually outscored the Flayers. The final score was 3-2. The historic moment of this match was when Caneran Everlong (the “best” player in the leagues history and the top scorer from last season) scored the final Touchdown of the match. Officials would later realise that this was the 1000th Touchdown scored in the leagues history! Another Milestone for the Rangers. Unfortunately for the Flayers, the MVP was awarded to one of the Mercs (who scored a Touchdown) who promptly left the team laughing all the way to the bank!

Back in North Division the Wee Tree Fellows hosted a game against the Innsmouth Shadows. We don’t know if it was the fact that the Shadows where playing above ground or because Gerhard gave them a complement but they started the match of badly. Initially the Wee Tree Fellows dominated the match and run rings around the Necromantic powerhouse. As the Elves got excited about the prospect of a win and the Shadow fans prepared themselves for “another one of those seasons” the Shadows came back to life (not literally, that would have been something to see)! After a last minute touchdown before the end of the half the Shadows appeared to have a game plan. During the second half they quickly secured the ball and then proceeded to tear into the Elves trying to eliminate them from the pitch. With the numbers thinned they strolled over the line to win the match. Fortunately for the Fellows, they didn’t suffer any permanent injuries although it may take them a few weeks to get over the shock.
The Shadows have posted their own version of events over on their official site.

The next match in South Division was the debut of the Lustria Leapers against the Tutsbone Jackles. In the sprit of the old fable the Tortoise vs the Hare this match saw a contrast of styles with the fast moving Slann against slow but deadly Khemri. It looks like Anubis is finally smiling down upon the Jackles as they had a good match. The Leapers impressed the crowd with their aerobatics but they could not secure the ball long enough to make any lasting impression. The Jackles on the other hand shrugged off their long standing tradition of failing to pick up the ball and managed to score two Touchdowns. The end result was 2-0 with the Jackles picking up their second ever win in the HDWSBBL!

The final match to take place in North Division was the Orcland Cleavers taking a visit to meet the new Halfling team, the Whereinthehellarewe tribe. As expected, the Cleavers used the match to exact revenge against the rest of the league. Despite two large Treemen on their side the Tribe where outclassed on most fronts. They did manage to pull off an impressive Touchdown (and a few impressive dirty tricks) but the Cleavers quickly closed them down and took them out the match. The match ended 2-1 to the Cleavers to lift their spirits. The Halflings suffered no long term injuries and one them (Sun in eyes) even managed to pick up the Guard skill while taking the joint number 1 spot as player of the season….

The final match this week was between two debuting teams, the Grunhelm Gemcutters and Damage Inc. It looks like the Chaos Pacts offer of “free” beer was not too popular as only 6,000 fans turned up to see them play! They carried on regardless though. With two teams designed to hurt the opposition as much as possible, this was never going to be a fine display of passing or daring moves, instead both teams tore into each other from the second the whistle blew to long after the game had finished! The three big guys fronting Damage Inc smashed into the Dwarves holding the line as the Troll Slayers whipped themselves into a frenzy. Early on in the match Damage Inc took control and had possession of the ball for most of the 1st Half, however the Dwarves managed to “sprint” away with the ball when the Troll forgot what it was doing and score to close the first half. From there Damage Inc fell apart as the Troll spent the second half picking flowers, the Orge was gang-fouled into the injuries box and the Minotaur stood screaming at the Dwarves (when the Troll slayers where not knocking it down). In the end the Gemcutters won 3-0 in the biggest victory of the week. Damage in are now down two players for their next match including a missing Ogre!

We some more action lined up for this week as the teams adjust to their new fixtures. As always, we will be back next week to recap all the action.

Quick Summary of Week 1

  • 3 games in North Division – Open Scramble 2510/11
  • 3 games in South Division – Open Scramble 2510/11
  • 25 Touchdowns scored
  • 24 Casualties caused (1 resulted in Death)
  • 27 Completions made
  • 32,000 fans was the highest recorded attendance.

Match Results for Week 1

(numbers in brackets are the casualties caused by each team)

Open Scramble 2510/11 – North Division

Open Scramble 2510/11 – South Division

Obituaries for Week 1

  • Lashiform Jr (Rat Ogre (Legacy) for Tail Slammers): Killed with the opening punch, of the opening match of the 2510/11 season by a slightly bigger big guy!  

League Standings for the Open Scramble 2510/11 (Week 1)

North Division

Orcland Cleavers 1 1 0 0 2 1 1 4 0 4 3
The Innsmouth Shadows 1 1 0 0 2 1 1 4 0 4 3
Tail Slammers 1 1 0 0 5 4 1 0 4 -4 3
The Brewers 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Teotigua Predators 1 0 0 1 4 5 -1 4 0 4 0
We Tree Fellows 1 0 0 1 1 2 -1 0 4 -4 0
Wherethehellarewe Tribe 1 0 0 1 1 2 -1 0 4 -4 0

South Division

Grunhelm Gemcutters 1 1 0 0 3 0 3 4 1 3 3
The Tutsbone Jackles 1 1 0 0 2 0 2 4 0 4 3
The Loren Rangers 1 1 0 0 3 2 1 3 0 3 3
Middenhein Manhunters 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
Brimstone Flayers 1 0 0 1 2 3 -1 0 3 -3 0
Lustria Leapers 1 0 0 1 0 2 -2 0 4 -4 0
Damage Inc 1 0 0 1 0 3 -3 1 4 -3 0

Player Statistics for the Open Scramble 2510/11 (Week 1)

Best Players

# Player Position Team Value
1 Unnamed Warrior Mercenary Brimstone Flayers 9
Sun In Eyes Halfling Wherethehellarewe Tribe 9
3 Kimo Skink Teotigua Predators 8
4 Harulf Oathholder Blocker Grunhelm Gemcutters 7
Carter Zombie The Innsmouth Shadows 7
Glog Gut-Rott Black Orc Blocker Orcland Cleavers 7
7 Invisible Rat Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 6
Pikai Skink Teotigua Predators 6
Murin Quicksilver Runner Grunhelm Gemcutters 6
(69) Jimmy Catcher We Tree Fellows 6

Top Scorers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Invisible Rat Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 2
Pikai Skink Teotigua Predators 2
Murin Quicksilver Runner Grunhelm Gemcutters 2
4 Arcani Spark Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Nurglost the Expectorus Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Bat Rat Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Kimo Skink Teotigua Predators 1
Rikku Skink Teotigua Predators 1
Ogtrek Goblinthrottler Troll Slayer Grunhelm Gemcutters 1
Caneran Everlong Catcher (Legacy) The Loren Rangers 1

Most Vicious

# Player Position Team Value
1 Moxal Kroxigor Teotigua Predators 2
Eleeazar Smith Werewolf The Innsmouth Shadows 2
3 Zoorba Saurus Teotigua Predators 1
Koorga Saurus Teotigua Predators 1
Some Kind of Monster Minotaur Damage Inc 1
Ogtrek Goblinthrottler Troll Slayer Grunhelm Gemcutters 1
Harulf Oathholder Blocker Grunhelm Gemcutters 1
Korun Orchewer Blocker Grunhelm Gemcutters 1
Valin Oldbeard Blocker Grunhelm Gemcutters 1
Cappella Goldfalcon Wardancer The Loren Rangers 1

Top Passers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Rulg Ear-Hacker Thrower Orcland Cleavers 3
2 Shadow Thrower Tail Slammers 2
Erison Youngwhite Thrower The Loren Rangers 2
(03) Hamish ‘The Hammer’ Thrower We Tree Fellows 2
(21) Wallace Linesman We Tree Fellows 2
Wannamuffin Halfling Wherethehellarewe Tribe 2
7 Arcani Spark Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Remi Flesh Thrower Tail Slammers 1
Bat Rat Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Hasrael Halfheart Linesman Brimstone Flayers 1

Gerhard: Returning teams part 1

Editors note: As we are gluttons for punishment here in the HDWSBBL we have asked Gerhard to run his eyes over the first list of returning teams for this season and for him to give us our opinions. As always, we warn of potentially strong language and advise that people who are easily offended close their browser window now!

Charming intro, thanks team. Yes, being in the position of authority that I am, the league begged me to give my honest opinion on the returning teams for this season. As the first batch has been announced, I better get cracking!

Middenhein Manhunters

If you could see my handsome chiselled face right now, you may notice that my Jaw has dropped so low it has bounced of my desk! Since the inception of the league, only one team has so constantly “impressed” me with their ineptitude! After thinking that they had gone to the great Astro-granite pitch in the sky, the Manhunters have suddenly returned from out of nowhere to redefine the meaning of loser once again.

There is not a lot of good I can say about this team. They have some amazing talent but their incompetence just overshadows any actual ability they had. Looking at their history within the league they have shown the ability to occasionally to pull off an upset but most of the time they are a run of the mill money drain.

Until recently I put the finest moment of Lord Havlock, their head coaches, career down as managing to kill the entire team and make it look like a mysterious shipping accident so he could run off and manage the Vixen’s (Sorry, I wasn’t supposed to reveal that little secret was I “Brynhilder”). It turns out that I gave him too much credit and in fact the team is so incompetent on and off the pitch that they managed to get lost in the middle of the ocean (or set sail to their boat with nobody on board, depending on which story you read. Either way it just screams stupidity)!

Welcome back Manhunters, I am sure I will be mentioning you in my upcoming articles!

Teotigua Predators

Oh goody, the little dinos are back. It’s once again time to watch where you step in case you crush their top scorer (or step on his waste). These little terrors should have been locked up and put in a zoo by now (or killed on my hunting trip over the summer) but for some reason they manage to persist to make my life so much more fun.

Swallowing my pride / hatred for a moment, they actually made it (alive) to the semi-finals of the Championship IV and managed to come third in the Pepslay Challenge. I shudder at the thought of them actually accomplishing something this season but they have a good shot. Hopefully the other teams will be more confident this season and be more willing to get themselves a new pair of dinosaur skinned boots (mine look very fetching). I expect to see a lot more from this team this season … on the obituaries page.

The Innsmouth Shadows

It appears that the Shadows are finally pulling themselves together. After a few seasons of “meh”-ness (yes, that’s a word) the team started to get some momentum at the tail end of last season. With their little doggies now well trained I expect them to begin to tear the league a new one and claim some proper Championship Gold here in the HDWSBBL.

I will go on record now and state that I expect them to be part of the Championship Cup Tournament (the inspirationally named Championship V) for the first time this season and for them to win a Divisional Championship (unless the Elves get in their first).

Its no secret that their performance is inversely related to how much praise I give to them so I hope I have not just jinxed them for the season (although, knowing their coach well, he will already have a book full of excuses lined up). Good luck my undead friends!

The Tail Slammers

Look out; the diseased fur balls are back. Its time to stock up on alcohol spray and prepare the showers if you are up against this team. The “best losers” team is back to attempt to win some matches. I honestly have no idea how they managed to do so well last season. Hopefully it was a fluke and they get the arse kicking they deserve.

It’s shocking to think that if the rumours are correct and neither the KKC or the Rangers return then one of these rats could actually be the best active player in the league. As much as I want to see the back of the Rangers I am not sure if I am willing to accept this. *shudders*

The Tutsbone Jackles

The shambling skellies from the east return (Can you see what I did there)? You would think that after 2 versions of the team over 3 seasons, they would have learnt how to pick the ball up by now? If I was their patron God I would be pretty mad right about now. They did give the Tail Slammers a good kicking last season which gave me a good laugh. Hopefully they will repeat the same this season, after all its not like they have to worry about catching anything from them!

I do wonder though, now that RSV have disbanded, who will they manage to defeat this season?


Season 4 – Week 23 – Rats Win, Orcs Lose and Rangers win the Pepslay?

Although we only had three matches this week, the fans watching in the stadiums and in the bars across the Old World certainly got lots of entertainment this week!

The first match of the week was an unannounced early fixture from the 4th round of the Pepslay Challenge 2509/10. It appears as though after all the excitement from the 3rd round of the Pepslay, the two top placed teams could not wait to get their hands on each other. After begging the HDWSBBL Commissioners to let them play early the Loren Rangers and the Innsmouth Shadows squared off to see if they could determine the winner of the Pepslay Challenge.

It was certainty unusual for the Shadows to openly look forward to playing an Elf team but just before the start of the match details of their diabolical plans became public. They had managed to convince the HDWSBBL officials that the Ranger Treeman Oakton was actually another Woodelf in a costume (after all, he did score last week) and as result he was to be closely watch for the match and any show of excessive movement or violence would see him ejected from the game.

With the Rnagers on their toes, both teams lined up in the sweltering heat of the match day (although it didn’t appear to effect the Shadows who managed to bring some thick sun screen with them! The Shadows managed to get hold of the ball early and take advantage of the de-hydrated Elves after a rare fumble by the Rangers. A few moments later the crowd was stunned as the Shadows took an early lead. The Rangers fought back though and it was soon 1 – 1 as the match entered half time.

The Rangers suffered greatly over the half time break with the majority of the team succumbing to the sweltering heat. The Shadows soon found themselves outnumbering the Elves and pressed their advantage and scored their Second Touchdown of the match. With the end of the game drawing nearer the Rangers had to strike fast or lose the Championship. In the dying moments of the game, despite the heat, the bribed officials, the spiked drinks and a very angry Werewolf the Rangers struck fast with a last minute Touchdown. While it lacked the style of their normal play it got the job done and the match finished 2-2!

As a result both teams finish the Pepslay Challenge on 100 points with the Rangers ahead on Touchdown Difference. With only two other teams capable of catching up with the Rangers at the top, their fans are already beginning the celebrate this victory however some people are keeping a cool head about this and are waiting to see the outcome of the remaining matches in two weeks to see if they Rangers are still the HDWSBBL Challenge Cup Champions!

The other two matches talking place this week where just as important. The final four teams in the Slammer Shield faced each other to determine who would be advancing to the Finals. As mentioned previously here in the WarZone there have been a lot fans who have been surprised by the form of the Tail Slammers! Considering the form they where on when at the end of the League stages of the Open Scramble it is an absolute miracle by Nuffle (or a daring plot by the Skaven council) to see the team reach the Semi-Finals.

With this in mind, this week they took on one of the favourites for the competition, the Grappler Flesh Grinders. As always both teams were eager to play the match even though most spectators (including Gerhard) were there to watch the Slammers get destroyed by the Grinders in what most people thought would be a one-sided match! What they didn’t expect however was the Slammers tearing away with the ball seconds into the match and getting within Yards of the end zone! Fortunately for the Grinder fans Arcani Spark stumbled with the ball and the Grinders quickly took possession. From there control of the ball passed between the two teams at a frantic pace. Every time the Slammers got he ball the Grinders would take the rat out, however before the unconcious Skaven could even hit the ground the ball was already moving back up the pitch! This stalemate was ended when late into the second half Shice Venom scored the First Touchdown of the match for the Slammers.

Not just content with taking the lead, the Slammers added fuel to the rumours that their form has been induced by magic by performing something I don’t think anybody ever expected to see. With the clock ticking down the Slammers began to fight back and started to take the Grinders out of action! Slowly but surely the Orcs where picked off one by one. To the relief of the paying public the Grinders came to their senses and began to plough through the Slammers as they celebrated on the pitch. As the final whistle blew the Slammers were declared the victors however only one of them was left on the pitch to celebrate, the rest had been carried off the pitch on stretchers!

The other Semi-final match was between the Orcland Cleavers and the defending champions, the Beaumont Blitzers. As most fans expected, this match broke down into scenes of extreme violence just seconds after the whistle. At times it felt like the ball was forgotten as both teams crashed into each other for long slogs across the pitch. At one point the Blitzers managed to break free with the ball but a hired Wizard struck down their star Thrower with a lightning bolt talking him out of action for the next match. This didn’t put the Blitzers off though as they eventually broke through the fight and scored the winning Touchdown late in the first half.

The second half saw no additional Touchdowns being scored, insted the fans got a repeat of the first half and saw the two teams attempt to demolish each other. The end result is that the Blitzers will advance to the Finals of the Slammer Shield and could be the first team to successfully defend the Shield!

So, the Final of the Slammer Shield will see the Tail Slammers take on the Beaumont Blitzers. We will find out the eventual victor in just a few short weeks.

Quick Summary of Week 23

  • 1 games in Central Division – Pepslay Challenge 2509/10
  • 2 games in Semi Final – The Slammer Shield
  • 6 Touchdowns scored
  • 7 Casualties caused (0 resulted in Death)
  • 10 Completions made
  • 62,000 fans was the highest recorded attendance.

Match Results for Week 23

(numbers in brackets are the casualties caused by each team)

The Slammer Shield – Semi Final

Pepslay Challenge 2509/10 – Central Division

Player Statistics for the (Week 23)

Best Players

# Player Position Team Value
1 Blarig Blitzer Grappler Flesh Grinders 14
2 Gariad Blitzer Tail Slammers 11
3 Eroshnak Fear-Hammer Linesman Orcland Cleavers 10
4 Erza Wheedon Werewolf The Innsmouth Shadows 8
Grunt Blitzer Beaumont Blitzers 8
6 Macbeth Thrower We Tree Fellows 6
7 Elliot Flesh Golem The Innsmouth Shadows 5
Moses Brown Zombie The Innsmouth Shadows 5
Binak Hell-Mangler Black Orc Blocker Orcland Cleavers 5
Remi Flesh Thrower Tail Slammers 5

Top Scorers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Blarig Blitzer Grappler Flesh Grinders 3
2 Bim Snotling The Man Eaters 1
Vragdish Nail-Eater Blitzer Orcland Cleavers 1
Binak Hell-Mangler Black Orc Blocker Orcland Cleavers 1
Nurglost the Expectorus Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Invisible Rat Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Erza Wheedon Werewolf The Innsmouth Shadows 1
(99) Connor ‘There is only one’ Blitzer We Tree Fellows 1
(7) Dec Catcher We Tree Fellows 1
Chuk ‘the Rock’ Lobba Thrower Beaumont Blitzers 1

Most Vicious

# Player Position Team Value
1 Gariad Blitzer Tail Slammers 3
2 Hairy Mac Ogre The Man Eaters 1
Flesh Mangler Ogre The Man Eaters 1
Rulg Ear-Hacker Thrower Orcland Cleavers 1
Binak Hell-Mangler Black Orc Blocker Orcland Cleavers 1
Eleeazar Smith Werewolf The Innsmouth Shadows 1
Charles Dexter Ward Flesh Golem The Innsmouth Shadows 1
Jargon ‘The Jawsplitter’ Juggernaught Troll Beaumont Blitzers 1
Shadow Thrower Tail Slammers 1
T’Yrong Blitzer Grappler Flesh Grinders 1

Top Passers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Vritz Blitzer Grappler Flesh Grinders 3
2 Invisible Rat Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 2
T’ong Thrower Grappler Flesh Grinders 2
(03) Hamish ‘The Hammer’ Thrower We Tree Fellows 2
Braashnak Eye-Bringer Linesman Orcland Cleavers 2
6 Arcani Spark Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Bat Rat Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 1
Macbeth Thrower We Tree Fellows 1
Chuk ‘the Rock’ Lobba Thrower Beaumont Blitzers 1
Fump Blitzer Beaumont Blitzers 1

Top Interceptors

# Player Position Team Value
1 Paddy ‘the Player’ Punisher Black Orc Blocker Beaumont Blitzers 1

Season 4 – Week 17 – A legend is born

After a couple of weeks off for the Empire Mordstill celebrations, the league was back in action this week. Officially 5 games took place however 3 of them where sadly forfeits including the qualification match for the Slammer Shield!

The first match was the final game in South Division between the Cleavers and the Bile Blitzers. A win for either team would have cemented their position in fourth place in the division meaning that they would have to avoid the qualification match for the Slammer shield. The last encounter between the two teams resulted in a win for the Bile ones so the Cleavers came out strong for the match. The Cleavers used their superior strength to plough through the rotten bodies of the opposition to score 4 times. Although the Blitzers fought hard during the match, in the end they could not keep the pace resulting in “another rotten” game.

The second game to take place this week as between the Corsairs and WTF. The Corsairs where looking for the win as it would almost guarantee them the North Division championship. From the opening moments, WTF knew they had a fight on their hands. The Corsairs rampaged through their team resulting in some serious injuries including top thrower Hamish who was taken out with a smashed collar bone before he had a chance to pick the ball up.

From there the Corsairs ground them down to a man ultimately killing two of the Elves and maiming three others. One of these deaths was by Balefire himself who can now claim to have killed 6 HDWSBBL players on the pitch (out of 9 attempts). The Corsairs ended up scoring 5 times although WTF did manage to score once when their mercenary Thrower managed to end up with the ball in the Corsairs half.

The highlight of the match though was Corsair Blitzer Valdrek Bloodgate scoring a Touchdown, causing a (fatal) Causality, catching an Interception and making a successful pass in the same game. After the match, the fans declared him the MVP of the match making Bloodgate the first person in HDWSBBL history to accomplish this amazing feat! The HDWSBBL commissioners where so impressed that a new award has been created called the Bloodgate which will be awarded to any future player should they accomplish this amazing feat.

The Slammer Shield was also due to have its preliminary qualifying match this week between the 5th placed teams from North and South Division. The Innsmouth Shadows where due to take on the Bile Blitzers but the Bile ones just didn’t have any fight left in them after their defeat at the hands of the Cleavers. As a result they forfeited the game.

The remaining two matches was the conclusion of the Bar Flys career here in the HDWSBBL. Their two remaining league opponents the Man Eaters and RSV where awarded the automatic win as a result of the Bar Flys Dropping out.

This week should see some action but most of the teams will be preparing themselves for the start of the recently announced Slammer Shield and the Championship IV.

Quick Summary of Week 17

  • 1 game in North Division – Open Scramble 2509/2510
  • 1 game in South Division – Open Scramble 2509/2510
  • 2 games in West Division – Open Scramble 2509/2510
  • 1 game in the First Round – The Slammer Shield
  • 16 Touchdowns scored
  • 7 Casualties caused (3 resulted in Death)
  • 10 Completions made
  • 1 Interception made
  • 31,000 fans was the highest recorded attendance.

Match Results for Week 17

(numbers in brackets are the casualties caused by each team)

The Slammer Shield – First Round

Open Scramble 2509/2510 – North Division

Open Scramble 2509/2510 – South Division

Open Scramble 2509/2510 – West Division

Obituaries for Week 17

  • Quakesweat (Rotter for The Bile Blitzers): Hisdiseaseridden flesh was torn open and sprayed over his body. what a rotten way to end his career. 

  • (11) Dougal ‘Furball’ (Linesman for We Tree Fellows): Had the “honour” of encountering Balefire in one of his moods. It was noted that the spray of blood from his ruptured neck drenched the first three rows. impressive. 

  • (16) Mcoist ‘Ranger’ (Linesman for We Tree Fellows): Killed by Bloodgate on his way to setting his immortal record. Poor Mcoist learnt that you cannot stop destiny! 

League Standings for the Open Scramble 2509/2510 (Week 17)

North Division

Karond Kar Corsairs 8 5 2 1 23 7 16 15 7 8 17
Drackwald Deadheads 7 4 2 1 12 8 4 10 11 -1 14
Tail Slammers 8 3 2 3 17 19 -2 15 19 -4 11
We Tree Fellows 7 1 3 3 14 21 -7 4 15 -11 6
The Innsmouth Shadows 8 1 1 6 9 20 -11 20 12 8 4

South Division

The Loren Rangers 8 8 0 0 36 9 27 6 11 -5 24
Teotigua Predators 8 4 1 3 18 16 2 5 5 0 13
Grappler Flesh Grinders 8 3 1 4 10 16 -6 6 2 4 10
Orcland Cleavers 8 2 1 5 11 15 -4 8 5 3 7
The Bile Blitzers 8 1 1 6 4 23 -19 10 12 -2 4

East Division

Atrocity Exhibition 5 5 0 0 12 2 10 13 9 4 15
Mc Cauligh Reavers 5 3 0 2 10 5 5 5 11 -6 9
Beaumont Blitzers 6 3 0 3 8 13 -5 14 6 8 9
The Tutsbone Jackles 6 0 0 6 1 11 -10 5 11 -6 0

West Division

Valhallen Vixen’s 6 4 1 1 16 9 7 8 10 -2 13
Ragnars Swift Velocity 6 3 1 2 15 10 5 6 4 2 10
The Man Eaters 6 2 2 2 10 10 0 11 6 5 8
Ruskin Arms Bar Flys 6 1 0 5 4 16 -12 1 6 -5 3

Player Statistics for the 2509/10 Season (Week 17)

Best Players

# Player Position Team Value
1 Caneran Everlong Catcher The Loren Rangers 61
2 Valdrek Bloodgate Blitzer Karond Kar Corsairs 52
3 Elesser Everlong Catcher The Loren Rangers 44
Viktor Runner Valhallen Vixen’s 44
5 Erison Youngwhite Thrower The Loren Rangers 35
6 Doomvenon Rotter The Bile Blitzers 34
7 Fredrick Roeder Catcher Ragnars Swift Velocity 33
Arcani Spark Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 33
Erza Wheedon Werewolf The Innsmouth Shadows 33
10 (03) Hamish ‘The Hammer’ Thrower We Tree Fellows 32

Top Scorers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Caneran Everlong Catcher The Loren Rangers 20
2 Viktor Runner Valhallen Vixen’s 13
3 Fredrick Roeder Catcher Ragnars Swift Velocity 11
Elesser Everlong Catcher The Loren Rangers 11
5 Valdrek Bloodgate Blitzer Karond Kar Corsairs 10
6 Arcani Spark Gutter Runner Tail Slammers 9
7 Ashinan Wyrmbane Blitzer Karond Kar Corsairs 8
8 Bodgeit ‘n’ Scarper Goblin Beaumont Blitzers 7
9 Elison Crownstar Catcher The Loren Rangers 6
Bruce Cruel-Lobber Ghoul Drackwald Deadheads 6

Most Vicious

# Player Position Team Value
1 Eleeazar Smith Werewolf The Innsmouth Shadows 8
Grim Bob Ogre The Man Eaters 8
3 Lashiform Rat Ogre Tail Slammers 7
Briel Fester Mummie Atrocity Exhibition 7
5 Erza Wheedon Werewolf The Innsmouth Shadows 5
Grgrad Moulder Mummie Atrocity Exhibition 5
7 Joeseph Kluger Linesman Ragnars Swift Velocity 4
Varkon Darkblade Blitzer Karond Kar Corsairs 4
Shunt Blitzer Beaumont Blitzers 4
T’Yrong Blitzer Grappler Flesh Grinders 4

Top Passers

# Player Position Team Value
1 Erison Youngwhite Thrower The Loren Rangers 35
2 (03) Hamish ‘The Hammer’ Thrower We Tree Fellows 25
3 Doomvenon Rotter The Bile Blitzers 22
4 T’ong Thrower Grappler Flesh Grinders 17
5 Rulg Ear-Hacker Thrower Orcland Cleavers 16
6 James Hetfielder Thrower Ragnars Swift Velocity 13
7 Chuk ‘the Rock’ Lobba Thrower Beaumont Blitzers 9
8 Shadow Thrower Tail Slammers 8
Erika Thrower Valhallen Vixen’s 8
10 Remi Flesh Thrower Tail Slammers 7

Top Interceptors

# Player Position Team Value
1 Valdrek Bloodgate Blitzer Karond Kar Corsairs 3
2 Trog Linesman Grappler Flesh Grinders 2
3 Hutchinson Wight The Innsmouth Shadows 1
Bim Snotling The Man Eaters 1
Shunt Blitzer Beaumont Blitzers 1
Carter Zombie The Innsmouth Shadows 1